I'm on a boat!

What do Mel Gibson, Keanu Reeves, and Steve Guttenberg all have in common? They've all played characters that have lived the best movie cliche ever: Living on a boat. Sometimes I wish I weren't all responsible and stuff, because I could totally see myself being a washed-up former cop that starts his own detective agency who one day takes on the case of a lifetime. With sexy results!

Valencia Apartments

I've always loved the Valencia. Living above a yarn store would give me a weird yet warm feeling of safety, like snuggling up in a wool blanket with 1990s Cher. The studios are always immaculately clean when I go check them out, pretending to need a studio. That is my sad life.
$735 seems like a lot for a studio there, especially since I think you have to pay for your own heat, so I can understand offering a special to get people in the door. But seriously? A free month at LA Fitness? That's like, the worst special ever. It's like getting a free 24oz Sprite. Two sips in, and I'm thinking it's more trouble than it's worth.

Dogs in Snow

Only at the Ardea.
Whatevs.
Totally not my demographic.
UPDATE: Whoever writes the ads for the Ardea is a total douche nozzle.
For example:
"NEED A MAN CAVE?"
"NUT NUT NUTTIN"
Oh my god. They keep posting more as I'm writing this blog post. I'm going to be up all night LOLing.
Here's a link to all of them.
I was kind of in a bad mood until I found this, so thanks, Ardea. Now whenever I'm feeling blue, I'll just think of you and keep Nut, Nut, Nuttin' along.